SOAP 7
Charlie and Sonali opted for a ring ceremony. You weren't allowed to get legally married while on field duty. Their friends Zarmeena and Nasreen were hugely flattered to be official witnesses. After all, what commander has that sort of relationship with 2 cpls? Certainly not in snooty HQ.
Equality too, it wasn't lost on 3 Kabul that the commander and his lovely wife shared a standard size unit, same as anyone else. Or mess, in HQ an officer-sgt mess, here you had private seated next to commander and chatting in friendly fashion.
Charlie entered his office. The unit clerk Tahmina asked if he'd sent the T15 form, HQ was demanding same. "Yeah, sent it, horse's patoots musta lost it again. Send them a copy."
Tahmina laughed, "someone should turn a pail of silverfish loose in the place."
Both laughed.
Eight of them were on a picnic, Charlie and Sonali, Zarmeena and Nasreen, Zala and Benazir, and Shabnab and Gulazar. It the distance, they spotted a woman in civvies, walking toward them.
By now, Charlie's superb distance vision had picked up a familiar walk. "Honey, hand me those binoculars please." He gasped, "y'all will never believe, my sister Pamela."
She came to the group. In English, which most would understand or mostly so, "Charlie, what on earth are you doing here?"
Drily, "was about to ask you the very same?"
Pamela hesitated, "they know English?"
"Most of them."
"In that case, I'd prefer to tell you privately. You, how'd it happen?"
"Your tea leaves were accurate. Now you know there's always lotsa drinking on the ferry on the way home. Well ah, I fell in."
She gasped, "is that Commander insignia?"
"I'm A/Cmdr of 3 Kabul, 150 authorized roster, 130 now. We educate some 1,000 refugee women and girls."
"Well since I'm here anyway, you need a doctor?"
Charlie turned, "tell her girls."
Resounding chorus of yesses.
He made the introductions, "my sister Pamela, my lovely wife Sonali" and named the rest.
"So Charlie, no known way off the island?"
"It's a space-and-time discontinuum, if you had a doctorate in physics, you still couldn't."
"So why am I here?"
"Look at the faces very carefully, tell me who you recognize."
Unerringly Pamela picked out Sonali, Zarmeena and Nasreen. "These faces, just so haunting, know them from somewhere."
"Tell her girls."
Zarmeena smiled, "you'd be Lt Steinbrenner, erstwhile 54th Battalion."
And in a minute, it all started to flood back.
Charlie grinned, took out a copy of the newsletter, showed Salima's photo, "recognize her?"
Pamela gasped, "holy dying sheep she-it, the one who shot you and the general. And she's your C-in-C now. Does she know about this?"
"Who do you think promoted me? Nothing personal, just 2 bottles of brandy that day."
Pamela paused, "so what'll this Salima do when she finds out I'm here?"
"Enroll you as a doctor, of course. Pays about 5 times what I get, 10 times what the rest here get. She'll be pleased, wants to put this unit on the map."
"So why does she like 3 Kabul?"
"Used to be the leprosy colony. Now we produce thrice as many course grads as the rest of the organization combined. She may not like us, but she needs us."
"You ah didn't have a hand in that, did you?"
"She thinks so. Order of Merit, here it's like the Vic Cross."
"My goodness, they just don't stop decorating you. Iron Cross, 5 in the British Army, this Order of Merit. But then, as I recall you earned that Iron Cross bigtime, saved lotsa lives. Saved Salima's whole darn company and what does she do a month later?"
He laughed, "all part of the circle of life."
And if you think the non-brethren were confused by now, yes, as much as if they'd just had 2 double espressos.
To confuse matters further, an envelope materialized on the blanket shared by Sonali and Charlie. It was in English, addressed to Pamela, shyly Sonali handed it to her.
Pamela's face clouded, "well I am accepted, but this salary is ridiculous."
Quietly, "lots more than we get. Care to trade places with anyone here?"
"That's bloody well kidnapping. I'll sue, I'll report you to ah to ah"
"Pamela, chill. We didn't kidnap you nor did Salima. Care to argue with the gods?"
She stared into space a long moment, "let's go see it."
Charlie turned to the others, "may as well stay, enjoy your picnic. I'll take her back."
Sonali entwined her hand in his, came.
As the three walked back, Pamela asked, "Charlie, are some of them, ah well ah lesbian?"
"What difference does it make? Are we not all God's children?"
Pamela went into shock seeing BOQ. "I have to live in this?"
"Come see the MQ unit, you'll realize you are well off."
Pamela gasped, "you are commander here and 2 of you live in this?"
"Equality. Private or corporal sees this, we get their respect."
Pamela started to cry.
Charlie asked, "Lt Steinbrenner, when on field duty in Yugoslavia, would you be taking it so?"
"No I wouldn't."
"This is a field op. Elite unit. Comradeship, friends, good food, satellite TV, magazines. Please just go with the flow."
Pamela looked off into the distance, turned, hugged Sonali, "I'm really sorry. You must think the worst of me. Well let's go see the mess."
If a little green Martian had arrived, people wouldn't be more shocked. The bull session was instantly forgotten.
In Dari, Charlie said, "this here's my sister Pamela, same kinda timewarp thing as me, she's gonna be our doctor."
Thunderous cheers, everyone crowded around hugging Pamela. Kitchen staff came on the run with goodies.
Someone said, "since you are the guest of honor, you choose the TV channel."
Pamela gave a loud mock groan, "anything except that stupid sci fi channel. Seen enough of that nonsense on the ride here."
Howls of laughter. Just like her brother, make a joke of it.
As she nibbled goodies, she was the center of attention, everyone asking about herself and about Britain.
By supper, she'd fallen into conversation with the education officer Adela and her partner counsellor Nooria. Seems all three like more or less the same literature. Talked half the night.
Next day, picnic with them.
As the three departed, Sonali turned to Charlie, "so far so good. When she sees sick bay, she'll freak."
"Maybe at first. But remember, Lt Steinbrenner was twice decorated for organizing counter-attacks under difficult conditions."
By suppertime Pamela was totally engrossed in Adela's and Nooria's circle of friends. Stayed for the Bollywood movie then talked half the night again.
Next morning, Charlie walked Pamela to sick bay, "I know you'll find it kinda primitive. But draw up a list of what you need, I'll do my darndest to kick butt in HQ."
As Pamela walked in though, she realized it was remarkably similar to sick bay from Battalion 54 days. "I'll start on the list. Just want you to know, Charlie, you're doing one heck of a job with zero resources."
"Thank you so much."
At lunchtime, Pamela was sitting with a circle of a dozen friends, thinking how cool it was.
Two days later she gave Charlie the list. He gulped, "I'll try."
He was flumoxed to get HQ's reply, approved as written.
He showed Pamela the letter.
She grinned, "that would be Salima's doing?"
"Who else? If the beancounters had their say, you'd need a separate form for each aspirin."
Equality too, it wasn't lost on 3 Kabul that the commander and his lovely wife shared a standard size unit, same as anyone else. Or mess, in HQ an officer-sgt mess, here you had private seated next to commander and chatting in friendly fashion.
Charlie entered his office. The unit clerk Tahmina asked if he'd sent the T15 form, HQ was demanding same. "Yeah, sent it, horse's patoots musta lost it again. Send them a copy."
Tahmina laughed, "someone should turn a pail of silverfish loose in the place."
Both laughed.
Eight of them were on a picnic, Charlie and Sonali, Zarmeena and Nasreen, Zala and Benazir, and Shabnab and Gulazar. It the distance, they spotted a woman in civvies, walking toward them.
By now, Charlie's superb distance vision had picked up a familiar walk. "Honey, hand me those binoculars please." He gasped, "y'all will never believe, my sister Pamela."
She came to the group. In English, which most would understand or mostly so, "Charlie, what on earth are you doing here?"
Drily, "was about to ask you the very same?"
Pamela hesitated, "they know English?"
"Most of them."
"In that case, I'd prefer to tell you privately. You, how'd it happen?"
"Your tea leaves were accurate. Now you know there's always lotsa drinking on the ferry on the way home. Well ah, I fell in."
She gasped, "is that Commander insignia?"
"I'm A/Cmdr of 3 Kabul, 150 authorized roster, 130 now. We educate some 1,000 refugee women and girls."
"Well since I'm here anyway, you need a doctor?"
Charlie turned, "tell her girls."
Resounding chorus of yesses.
He made the introductions, "my sister Pamela, my lovely wife Sonali" and named the rest.
"So Charlie, no known way off the island?"
"It's a space-and-time discontinuum, if you had a doctorate in physics, you still couldn't."
"So why am I here?"
"Look at the faces very carefully, tell me who you recognize."
Unerringly Pamela picked out Sonali, Zarmeena and Nasreen. "These faces, just so haunting, know them from somewhere."
"Tell her girls."
Zarmeena smiled, "you'd be Lt Steinbrenner, erstwhile 54th Battalion."
And in a minute, it all started to flood back.
Charlie grinned, took out a copy of the newsletter, showed Salima's photo, "recognize her?"
Pamela gasped, "holy dying sheep she-it, the one who shot you and the general. And she's your C-in-C now. Does she know about this?"
"Who do you think promoted me? Nothing personal, just 2 bottles of brandy that day."
Pamela paused, "so what'll this Salima do when she finds out I'm here?"
"Enroll you as a doctor, of course. Pays about 5 times what I get, 10 times what the rest here get. She'll be pleased, wants to put this unit on the map."
"So why does she like 3 Kabul?"
"Used to be the leprosy colony. Now we produce thrice as many course grads as the rest of the organization combined. She may not like us, but she needs us."
"You ah didn't have a hand in that, did you?"
"She thinks so. Order of Merit, here it's like the Vic Cross."
"My goodness, they just don't stop decorating you. Iron Cross, 5 in the British Army, this Order of Merit. But then, as I recall you earned that Iron Cross bigtime, saved lotsa lives. Saved Salima's whole darn company and what does she do a month later?"
He laughed, "all part of the circle of life."
And if you think the non-brethren were confused by now, yes, as much as if they'd just had 2 double espressos.
To confuse matters further, an envelope materialized on the blanket shared by Sonali and Charlie. It was in English, addressed to Pamela, shyly Sonali handed it to her.
Pamela's face clouded, "well I am accepted, but this salary is ridiculous."
Quietly, "lots more than we get. Care to trade places with anyone here?"
"That's bloody well kidnapping. I'll sue, I'll report you to ah to ah"
"Pamela, chill. We didn't kidnap you nor did Salima. Care to argue with the gods?"
She stared into space a long moment, "let's go see it."
Charlie turned to the others, "may as well stay, enjoy your picnic. I'll take her back."
Sonali entwined her hand in his, came.
As the three walked back, Pamela asked, "Charlie, are some of them, ah well ah lesbian?"
"What difference does it make? Are we not all God's children?"
Pamela went into shock seeing BOQ. "I have to live in this?"
"Come see the MQ unit, you'll realize you are well off."
Pamela gasped, "you are commander here and 2 of you live in this?"
"Equality. Private or corporal sees this, we get their respect."
Pamela started to cry.
Charlie asked, "Lt Steinbrenner, when on field duty in Yugoslavia, would you be taking it so?"
"No I wouldn't."
"This is a field op. Elite unit. Comradeship, friends, good food, satellite TV, magazines. Please just go with the flow."
Pamela looked off into the distance, turned, hugged Sonali, "I'm really sorry. You must think the worst of me. Well let's go see the mess."
If a little green Martian had arrived, people wouldn't be more shocked. The bull session was instantly forgotten.
In Dari, Charlie said, "this here's my sister Pamela, same kinda timewarp thing as me, she's gonna be our doctor."
Thunderous cheers, everyone crowded around hugging Pamela. Kitchen staff came on the run with goodies.
Someone said, "since you are the guest of honor, you choose the TV channel."
Pamela gave a loud mock groan, "anything except that stupid sci fi channel. Seen enough of that nonsense on the ride here."
Howls of laughter. Just like her brother, make a joke of it.
As she nibbled goodies, she was the center of attention, everyone asking about herself and about Britain.
By supper, she'd fallen into conversation with the education officer Adela and her partner counsellor Nooria. Seems all three like more or less the same literature. Talked half the night.
Next day, picnic with them.
As the three departed, Sonali turned to Charlie, "so far so good. When she sees sick bay, she'll freak."
"Maybe at first. But remember, Lt Steinbrenner was twice decorated for organizing counter-attacks under difficult conditions."
By suppertime Pamela was totally engrossed in Adela's and Nooria's circle of friends. Stayed for the Bollywood movie then talked half the night again.
Next morning, Charlie walked Pamela to sick bay, "I know you'll find it kinda primitive. But draw up a list of what you need, I'll do my darndest to kick butt in HQ."
As Pamela walked in though, she realized it was remarkably similar to sick bay from Battalion 54 days. "I'll start on the list. Just want you to know, Charlie, you're doing one heck of a job with zero resources."
"Thank you so much."
At lunchtime, Pamela was sitting with a circle of a dozen friends, thinking how cool it was.
Two days later she gave Charlie the list. He gulped, "I'll try."
He was flumoxed to get HQ's reply, approved as written.
He showed Pamela the letter.
She grinned, "that would be Salima's doing?"
"Who else? If the beancounters had their say, you'd need a separate form for each aspirin."
posted by afghangirlscifi @ 12:03 PM
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