Romance 2
Councillor continues, "now, either of you guess why the Finance Minister?"
Both Sgt and Lt gave up on that.
Councillor smiled wanly, "felt they needed one, my guess. So, go for an easy mission, 4 in the same city."
Sgt protested, "but ma'am, Meena Zohra is American."
"But she's in town the 25th and 26th on a book tour. One drop, one night, should be easy."
Sgt shifted uneasily, said nothing.
"What is it Sgt?"
"Ma'am, my experience, missions touted as easy flop. Far rather have one predicted as tough."
The sad sorry debacle was not really the aliens' fault. Lt Xoz simply lacked experience. Sgt Xar and Councillor Zir, both highly experienced, had never encountered the phenomenum before.
Nowhere else in the known galaxy were there 2 or more people with the same name.
No army with sense makes long jumps, straight from ship into a particular room. Takes a couple of seconds to re-orient after a long jump. In that time, in a confined space, you can be very dead. The boys would do the "two-step", long jump to back of building, reader searchers that could see through wall and wallet to spot the ID, then a short jump into the room.
Meena Zohra's book launch was in the public meeting room of the public library. She was unaware she had left her wallet in the cab; she still had her purse.
The cab company phoned the library, was transferred to the meeting room and informed her secretary on the tour that it was found, would be delivered. But at the crucial moment, Meena Zohra author, was ID-less.
Some 40 meters away, Meena Zohra library worker was not so lucky. She saw 2 green men over 6 feet tall, then all became black.
Lt Xoz thumbed the mike, "Red Leader, get package Number One?"
"Roger, Red One, out."
Was Councillor Zir or the boys suspicious of Meena's clothes? No. First, what man knows beans about womens' clothing? Second, Councillor thought it simply showed Meena's good sense. You don't dress to the nines on a book tour, talk down to women. You dress like one of the girls, fit in, connect.
Lata Persaud, Finance Minister, had an early evening meeting scheduled with the Premier of Canada's most recalcitrant province. After several minutes, both saw mutual deadlock, no possibility of compromise.
They cheerfully agreed not to waste the evening, shared a cab, Lata going to a coffee house for an Indo-Trinidadian poetry night and Premier to the casino.
Lata Persaud, building cleaner, was still in the building. Two cleaning jobs, this was her evening one. Were the 3 aliens surprised to find the Finance Minister of Canada wearing an ABC Cleaning Service smock? No. Back home, all bureaucrats either took bribes or had moonlight jobs under the table. The aliens were proud of this evidence showing Lata Persaud to be an honest person.
Prof Leblanc was out of town. Last moment, he'd got a guest speaker invite. Always seeking an honorarium, fine dinner and free booze, he cheerfully accepted; even though it was a political party he loathed.
So, how was it Marcel Leblanc, dishwasher, was in that upscale apartment building? Hadn't always been a dishwasher. Too much ladder work as a painter left his feet capable of standing, but not of ladders.
His friend Jean-Pierre had an under-the-table contract to repaint 4 vacant suites. J-P woke with a hangover, wondering where his boyhood Rimouski friend had vanished to.
The boys experienced severe revulsion collecting Suresh Patel. When they arrived, he was engaged in sex with another man. This was strictly forbidden back home.
Lt Xoz wanted to kill him on the spot. Sgt Xar prevailed, using a combination of appeal to duty, citing regulations and reminder of the dangers of ethnocentrism.
It was obvious to Councillor Zir what had happened. The subject was naked, had been indulging in sex. Social mores back home were that young lovers cheerfully used park benches if that's all they had and no one was offended, simply looked the other way. So, a level of upset like that, had to be homosex.
She drew the Sgt aside, questioned him and he told the truth.
She now had a serious decision. Counsellors back home claimed a 99% success rate in such cases, convincing people to stop gay and be straight. But she had no way of knowing if such counselling would be effective on an Earthling.
It was within her authority to take someone else in Suresh's place. But if she didn't find a bona fide underground economy expert, she'd end up commanding the Ice Moon Garrison.
Odds? 1 in 2. Lata Persaud looked rather like a prize-fighter, definitely not someone to tempt a gay away from gaydom. Meena Zohra on the other hand, was beautiful enough to tempt a monk away from monkdom. Hopefully, it would work.
Feeling washed out, she took an aspirin, asked herself why she didn't retire last year, when the buyout packages were still there.
Captain approached Councillor respectfully, "ma'am, one hour to leaving orbit."
So now she had to decide in a hurry. Instinct and experience told her men usually read such situations wrong. So she asked the Sgt what he'd do if it were his choice.
Blushing, but not hesitating one nanosecond, Sgt replied, "ma'am, I'd kill him, get another. He was getting a way too much pleasure, he'll never change."
And so it was Councillor decided to keep Suresh Patel. That and not wishing to risk 138 crewmen lives while she sat in orbit for days searching.
So far the aliens have a rather poor batting average. Three of four, flat out got the wrong person. The fourth, a year-long counselling which might or might not work. And yet there were obstacles in the way of these aliens discovering mistaken identity. All 3 had some knowledge of what they should know.
Meena Zohra library worker was no stranger to writing. She'd written 2 novellas, 2 novels, a dozen short stories, yet sold nothing yet. She'd been published in a book review series for the local free paper, not getting a fee, but getting to keep the book each time.
Marcel Leblanc knew sub-cultures up close and personal. Francophone, alcoholic and AA, girlfriends of various ethnic groups, weed-smoking, and racetrack.
Both Lata Persaud's cleaning jobs were in government offices. Day job, she overheard lots. Even the evening job, still overheard some. Evening job was slack, she got a chance to read the day-discarded newspaper.
Meena Zohra came to first. Her reaction was fierce, smoking-hot anger. They hadn't just abducted her, they had added insult to injury by doing so on Student Loan Freedom Day.
Originally she had received her Bachelor of Education degree and a $20,000 student loan to go with it. One semester and then the nervous breakdown drove her out of teaching, but still left her saddled with a colossal debt to repay off meager library salary. Ten years of struggle and she was just finished with it.
Someone would pay for this, bigtime. You just do not mess with Afghan women, the fiercest there are on planet Earth.
Marcel Leblanc reacted almost with relief. He owed the payday loan people $400, his pusher $50, his bookie $500, his brother-in-law $200 and Revenue Canada $23,000.
Well, he reasoned quite correctly, if they wanted me dead, I'd be dead already. Means they want something so I have bargaining power.
Lata Persaud's first thought was abduction for the sex trade. She discarded this quickly. After all, she knew she was no beauty queen. If that's what they wanted, there were millions of others more desirable.
She was the first to correctly reason they wanted her namesake, not her. We-ell, she thought, I do have a proper schooling in Guyana, can talk hoyty-toyty if I want. So, I am the Finance Minister of Canada, as of now. If not carried off properly, likely thrown out a hatch into space.
For safety, it was felt best to leave Lt Xoz out of the loop. He had been rather severely traumatized by what he witnessed.
Councillor Zir would deal with the Earthlings, in the presence of the muscular Sgt Xar, to ensure they did not become aggressive.
As soon as he was addressed as Prof Leblanc, Marcel reached the same conclusion as Lata.
And Meena, was soon to follow.
All three impostors could of course instantly see through each other. But all knew the aliens were fooled - best kept that way.
Both Sgt and Lt gave up on that.
Councillor smiled wanly, "felt they needed one, my guess. So, go for an easy mission, 4 in the same city."
Sgt protested, "but ma'am, Meena Zohra is American."
"But she's in town the 25th and 26th on a book tour. One drop, one night, should be easy."
Sgt shifted uneasily, said nothing.
"What is it Sgt?"
"Ma'am, my experience, missions touted as easy flop. Far rather have one predicted as tough."
The sad sorry debacle was not really the aliens' fault. Lt Xoz simply lacked experience. Sgt Xar and Councillor Zir, both highly experienced, had never encountered the phenomenum before.
Nowhere else in the known galaxy were there 2 or more people with the same name.
No army with sense makes long jumps, straight from ship into a particular room. Takes a couple of seconds to re-orient after a long jump. In that time, in a confined space, you can be very dead. The boys would do the "two-step", long jump to back of building, reader searchers that could see through wall and wallet to spot the ID, then a short jump into the room.
Meena Zohra's book launch was in the public meeting room of the public library. She was unaware she had left her wallet in the cab; she still had her purse.
The cab company phoned the library, was transferred to the meeting room and informed her secretary on the tour that it was found, would be delivered. But at the crucial moment, Meena Zohra author, was ID-less.
Some 40 meters away, Meena Zohra library worker was not so lucky. She saw 2 green men over 6 feet tall, then all became black.
Lt Xoz thumbed the mike, "Red Leader, get package Number One?"
"Roger, Red One, out."
Was Councillor Zir or the boys suspicious of Meena's clothes? No. First, what man knows beans about womens' clothing? Second, Councillor thought it simply showed Meena's good sense. You don't dress to the nines on a book tour, talk down to women. You dress like one of the girls, fit in, connect.
Lata Persaud, Finance Minister, had an early evening meeting scheduled with the Premier of Canada's most recalcitrant province. After several minutes, both saw mutual deadlock, no possibility of compromise.
They cheerfully agreed not to waste the evening, shared a cab, Lata going to a coffee house for an Indo-Trinidadian poetry night and Premier to the casino.
Lata Persaud, building cleaner, was still in the building. Two cleaning jobs, this was her evening one. Were the 3 aliens surprised to find the Finance Minister of Canada wearing an ABC Cleaning Service smock? No. Back home, all bureaucrats either took bribes or had moonlight jobs under the table. The aliens were proud of this evidence showing Lata Persaud to be an honest person.
Prof Leblanc was out of town. Last moment, he'd got a guest speaker invite. Always seeking an honorarium, fine dinner and free booze, he cheerfully accepted; even though it was a political party he loathed.
So, how was it Marcel Leblanc, dishwasher, was in that upscale apartment building? Hadn't always been a dishwasher. Too much ladder work as a painter left his feet capable of standing, but not of ladders.
His friend Jean-Pierre had an under-the-table contract to repaint 4 vacant suites. J-P woke with a hangover, wondering where his boyhood Rimouski friend had vanished to.
The boys experienced severe revulsion collecting Suresh Patel. When they arrived, he was engaged in sex with another man. This was strictly forbidden back home.
Lt Xoz wanted to kill him on the spot. Sgt Xar prevailed, using a combination of appeal to duty, citing regulations and reminder of the dangers of ethnocentrism.
It was obvious to Councillor Zir what had happened. The subject was naked, had been indulging in sex. Social mores back home were that young lovers cheerfully used park benches if that's all they had and no one was offended, simply looked the other way. So, a level of upset like that, had to be homosex.
She drew the Sgt aside, questioned him and he told the truth.
She now had a serious decision. Counsellors back home claimed a 99% success rate in such cases, convincing people to stop gay and be straight. But she had no way of knowing if such counselling would be effective on an Earthling.
It was within her authority to take someone else in Suresh's place. But if she didn't find a bona fide underground economy expert, she'd end up commanding the Ice Moon Garrison.
Odds? 1 in 2. Lata Persaud looked rather like a prize-fighter, definitely not someone to tempt a gay away from gaydom. Meena Zohra on the other hand, was beautiful enough to tempt a monk away from monkdom. Hopefully, it would work.
Feeling washed out, she took an aspirin, asked herself why she didn't retire last year, when the buyout packages were still there.
Captain approached Councillor respectfully, "ma'am, one hour to leaving orbit."
So now she had to decide in a hurry. Instinct and experience told her men usually read such situations wrong. So she asked the Sgt what he'd do if it were his choice.
Blushing, but not hesitating one nanosecond, Sgt replied, "ma'am, I'd kill him, get another. He was getting a way too much pleasure, he'll never change."
And so it was Councillor decided to keep Suresh Patel. That and not wishing to risk 138 crewmen lives while she sat in orbit for days searching.
So far the aliens have a rather poor batting average. Three of four, flat out got the wrong person. The fourth, a year-long counselling which might or might not work. And yet there were obstacles in the way of these aliens discovering mistaken identity. All 3 had some knowledge of what they should know.
Meena Zohra library worker was no stranger to writing. She'd written 2 novellas, 2 novels, a dozen short stories, yet sold nothing yet. She'd been published in a book review series for the local free paper, not getting a fee, but getting to keep the book each time.
Marcel Leblanc knew sub-cultures up close and personal. Francophone, alcoholic and AA, girlfriends of various ethnic groups, weed-smoking, and racetrack.
Both Lata Persaud's cleaning jobs were in government offices. Day job, she overheard lots. Even the evening job, still overheard some. Evening job was slack, she got a chance to read the day-discarded newspaper.
Meena Zohra came to first. Her reaction was fierce, smoking-hot anger. They hadn't just abducted her, they had added insult to injury by doing so on Student Loan Freedom Day.
Originally she had received her Bachelor of Education degree and a $20,000 student loan to go with it. One semester and then the nervous breakdown drove her out of teaching, but still left her saddled with a colossal debt to repay off meager library salary. Ten years of struggle and she was just finished with it.
Someone would pay for this, bigtime. You just do not mess with Afghan women, the fiercest there are on planet Earth.
Marcel Leblanc reacted almost with relief. He owed the payday loan people $400, his pusher $50, his bookie $500, his brother-in-law $200 and Revenue Canada $23,000.
Well, he reasoned quite correctly, if they wanted me dead, I'd be dead already. Means they want something so I have bargaining power.
Lata Persaud's first thought was abduction for the sex trade. She discarded this quickly. After all, she knew she was no beauty queen. If that's what they wanted, there were millions of others more desirable.
She was the first to correctly reason they wanted her namesake, not her. We-ell, she thought, I do have a proper schooling in Guyana, can talk hoyty-toyty if I want. So, I am the Finance Minister of Canada, as of now. If not carried off properly, likely thrown out a hatch into space.
For safety, it was felt best to leave Lt Xoz out of the loop. He had been rather severely traumatized by what he witnessed.
Councillor Zir would deal with the Earthlings, in the presence of the muscular Sgt Xar, to ensure they did not become aggressive.
As soon as he was addressed as Prof Leblanc, Marcel reached the same conclusion as Lata.
And Meena, was soon to follow.
All three impostors could of course instantly see through each other. But all knew the aliens were fooled - best kept that way.
posted by afghangirlscifi @ 2:31 PM
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