Green Lake 8

Martina asks, "are you ah Jamila?"
"Yes."
"Sorry, TV changes appearance so much. With all that body armor, the Silver Star and blaster, you looked so much bigger."
"If you don't find me attractive, just say so."
"Honey I don't give a da** about appearance. I'm a celebrity groupy. Like to see how many I can bag. So what was Chernobyl 2 like?"
"Exhilirating, never felt more alive, sights so ugly they were beautiful."
"Still, despite the meds, wouldn't like your odds of a child being even halfway normal?"
"No plans for that."
"First time swinging this way?"
I nod.
"So what perversions you prefer?"
"None, was thinking of plain."
"Vanilla? Have you lost your mind? Nobody does vanilla anymore, hasn't for centuries. Tell you what, paddle my butt, I'm your eager willing slave for the weekend."
Well, when in Rome. I ain't going into detail, this ain't porn, just my story.
Monday morning, I give Portia a gift certificate at the bookstore to show my appreciation.
She just grins, "don't go back, she just bags a celeb once. Gotta find a real girlfriend."
I grin proudly, "yep, on my way."
"Dig out the list Sylvie gave you."
Reluctantly I do.
"Right, now the one I mark with 2 stars, you must read, life or death. Any I mark with one star, interesting but not essential. No star, means forget it, too theoretical."
"There's something you aren't telling me Portia."
"Sugar, I don't know you well enough. You might be into shooting the messenger when you don't like the message."
Curious, I call up the 2 library sites here. One is an ordinary base library, geared to recreation and family use; other HQ one, more like a university library.
There's only one book which the base library has, the two-star one. They have 25 copies. Now that is a clue that it is useful, readable, popular. HQ library has all the rest, but one or two copies only.
After supper I go to the base library. Nobody bats an eye when I check it out.
Next 3 evenings are one mega-shocker. What started as a weekend of fun has become a quagmire. Oh yes, I know all the usual stuff, how difference in education, race and religion can cause problems in a straight marriage.
But hobbies? Come on, what guy doesn't watch football when his wife goes to bowl? The lesbian couple must have compatible hobbies. Why? Level of jealousy is so intense, they just don't trust concepts like Ladies Night Out or him going stag to the ballgame.
Throw in the perception I'm already too old, damaged goods, nuts.
There's thrice the level of emotional intensity in a lesbian relationship as a straight one. Why? What man doesn't shrug, say "all women are so." What woman doesn't shrug, say "all men are like that." Lesbian relationships don't give that breathing room. A chapter full of examples shows the point.
Don't forget about those perversions. Martina was right, vanilla went the way of the dodo bird. Now there is a list of over 150 perversions. Not too surprisingly, each is holier-than-thou, viewing themselves as superior to the rest.
Don't forget about the complications of who has what addiction.
My head hurts, my eyes glaze over. It's enough to make you wanna dash out, join a Catholic order. You can't, they disappeared centuries ago.
Sunday afternoon, I go for a walk, drop the book in the return slot.